Ryan Paul

Archive for August, 2007


Independence for Colonial Countries and Peoples

Freedom is supposed to be an inherent human right… with or without the United Nations or anyone propping it up as their cause. People are supposed to have freedom before they have anything else.

I simply cannot fathom why ANYONE in any country founded upon the domination and colonisation of the indigenous folk would not want to let them be free, and make reparations. I know why – because white folk just don’t want to lose all their nice vehicles and houses, manicured lawns, thousands in the bank and all the other luxuries this country has afforded them on the backs of genocide.

I’m feeling more and more strongly about this with each passing week as I study more and learn about what’s REALLY happened. I recently copied a text from the United Nations website about the Declaration on the Granting of Independence to Colonial Countries and Peoples. It’s eye opening when you put it into context and see just what Canada, the United States and Australia amongst many other countries are NOT doing.

Half of the problem is that half of the white folk don’t look at it from the other side. The other half of the problem is that the other half do look at it from the other side and don’t do anything about it because they don’t want to.

Stress in the Office

Stupidly I recently discovered the feature to delay blog posts which is why there’s a double post today.

My stress levels in the office hit a second-most all time high. It’s getting progressively harder and harder to hold my tongue and taking longer and longer to de-stress at the end of the day.

I very nearly blew up today – instead I turned it inward which is probably why I’m still here feeling in a rage five hours later.

One thing that literally made me on cloud nine was when I walked in the door and turned the corner. I was greeted with a ‘DADDYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY’ followed by a 50lb flying missile straight into my arms.

The military pull is affecting me harder and harder. I want it so very badly, but the fact I’m a father is obviously a very big factor in deciding whether I enlist or not. Could I handle being away from my children for extended periods of time?

A client for which we’re developing a website came in today. Both the father and daughter are British, and the mother is American. It is extremely refreshing to talk with someone with a British accent. Especially when it’s someone who’s in my generation and a genuinely nice person. It actually makes me feel normal for a short while instead of just being a foreigner settling in a strange environment.

Work and a Movie

I spent all of Saturday working partly at the office, and all through the night on two client websites. Set them up using wordpress and was configuring a plugin to collapse subpages. I wanted one that use the wsite_list_pages function so I could use it in conjuction with other pages but it didn’t work… so I ended up having to use a different plugin which emulates the wsite_list_pages function and had to manually exclude a few pages, and order them appropriately. The other client website was set up using wordpress… just waiting for the content on both. All in all that took about 10 hours and I was exhausted when I finished.

I took Nicolas to see ‘The Bourne Ultimatum’. It was decent definitely, but not as good as the two previous Bourne titles. Nicolas was running around the seats… down one aisle, across underneath the screen and up the other aisle. He wasn’t making a sound but these two meathead punks complained and said he was distracting. I tried to tell them the screen is ten feet above his head.. and how is it possible for him to distract them. In the end I had to hold him in his seat for a while until he started watching the movie.

I’m not looking forward to work next week. To be perfectly honest I don’t look forward to work any day anymore. Never know what the coming days will bring anymore

Photoshop vs Paintshop Pro

A client at work bought Adobe CS3 Design Premium at USD$2,050.86. Exactly thirty days later they had to get a refund because they simply didn’t need the raw power and control that CS3 brings. It was a shame coz I got to play with it for about two hours and I loved the f**king thing. Once my home based business of blogging takes off sometime in the next 20 years I’m going to buy it (or its successor).There’s a coupla things I don’t like about Photoshop that I love about Paintshop Pro. Paintshop Pro has far better and developed support for vector graphics. I don’t want to have to open up another program although Mikey doesn’t seem to see the problem with that.

I also love the foreground-background feature in Paintshop. You can draw a shape, or a line or anything at all and put a gradient as the background color and it will put the gradient as a border around whatever shape you’re using.

I love the rounded corner selection that Paintshop has, and lastly I love that you can do a right-click paste and have whatever’s in your clipboard open a new blank canvas and be pasted into it. In Photoshop you have to create the canvas first and then paste which bothers me.

I haven’t use Paintshop Pro in about six months now, but I still stand by my previous observations that with practice and skill, there’s almost nothing that Photoshop can do that Paintshop Pro can’t. I do wish Photoshop had support for opening Paintshop Pro images… you’d think they’d do that to poach more users.

Shagging, Email Scams, Pumping Iron and Infections

In the interests of… well me, I’m going to try and emulate certain characteristics of some blogs more successful than mine. I wish I could start blogging in a British tone too. I think like a Brit (obviously DUHHHH) but when I blog it doesn’t come out as typically British which f**king bothers me.

I know it sounds like such a cliche but someone I know is ALWAYS in a much better mood the morning after they just got shagged. Going by today, I should start paying certain parties to shag the person in question. My life would definitely improve!

I got another of those email scams today… the usual sort where the fucknut says he/she is related to a late blah blah and there’s millions waiting to be claimed. Usually I just delete them but for some reason I emailed the person back and told them:

Fuck off and drop dead.

Your scam is well known We know you are trying to steal money from
unsuspecting people.

GET A F**KING JOB!

On a slightly different note, I found a wordpress plugin that posts to a notifying blog in my myspace profile that a new entry has been submitted. Pretty sweet plugin.

I’m going to the gym four times a week now. It’s going great – the eating is always the hard part. I mostly go in my lunch hour and have started mass buying cans of tuna, along with mayonnaise and bread so I can chow down when I get back to the office. I’m starting to see results VERY VERY slowly… I’m up to 174.5lbs although mostly I still look like a f**king rake. I reckon my pecs are developing a little more than everything else coz I’m concentrating on them. I’m eating meal replacements for afternoon and morning snack and trying desperately hard to keep up on all my meals. The amount of weight I can chest press at the gym has gone up by about 15lbs in the last three weeks, although it’s still about 25lbs lighter than before I got my matrix. I’m usually doing the chest press 4 sets of 12… then the tricep pushdowns 4 sets of 12… then the cable row 4 sets of 12, then preacher curls at 4 sets of 12. I feel good now that I’m going regularly again. Pretty soon I’ll be back up to the weights I was at before.

Alex has got a urinary infection which we’ve got medication for. She was at fourty-one degrees the other night which freaked me out as she was so hot, I had beads of sweat running down my forehead when holding her. Took her to the hospital twice in one day. They tried to put in a catheter 6 times and couldn’t so they stopped. She’s on the mend now… just more irritable and needing constant attention coz she gets pissed off when she’s not with anyone.

White Folk Trying To Take From Natives

There’s two types of white folk in Canada. There’s caucasian of which I am half… and then there’s the ‘Metis’. Although the term means ‘half’ in french, in Canada it’s come to mean something quite quite different. Basically… any white person with ‘i want to be’ syndrome can become Metis and pretend they’re aboriginal.

Like damnit when are the Metis going to get it that they are NOT aboriginal and there are millions of people in Canada that don’t like paying Read more...

Asinine People

Admitting that I am prone to fault is hard for me to admit and it’s hard for me to admit that it’s hard for me to admit that. One of my faults is that I get rather angry at asinine people trying to display a level of maturity that is beyond them. I have no illusions about how mature or immature I am… I know what I am and don’t try to change it either way.

But when I get a teen whippersnapper trying to spread a lie about me, it does tend to get my goat. On another forum, a whole bunch of stuff has happened… based mainly around topics I talk about that this poxy little ‘in-crowd’ existing of about four people don’t seem to want to talk about. Some are annoying, some I respect even though I disagree with, but some just plainly make me wanna do something silly like throw this $500 monitor through the window.

I had to write this seperately as I needed a vent.

Miscellaneous

Went to Eagle Lake pow wow on Saturday. Got there around 1930hrs. Each time I go there I realise why people love it so much. You don’t need to be native to appreciate awesome dancing. I don’t know how it is for others… but when the drumming is awesome, and dancers to match I literally forget everything around me and zone in on the dancing. For those who don’t know… the drum beat is representing the heartbeat of ‘Mother Earth’. If you get a good drum group like Northern Wind, Whitefish Bay Singers or Bear Creek, the beat becomes insidious. Sitting there watching the dancers moving in time to the drum you start focusing on that… before you know you’re moving in time to the drum and quite simply lose sight of the hundreds of people around you. It’s still quite weird… even more so considering my race… or what my race is not.

I dearly wish and hope for Nicolas to grass dance and Alex to shawl dance when they are both old and confident enough. I don’t want my children to lose out on one half of their culture because I’m not indigenous. I definitely don’t want them to become living proof that the government’s racist assimilation policies work so well. I don’t want them to become typical ‘assimilated indians’.

I can teach them about making the perfect cup of tea, and tending to a garden, and how to make Bangers & Mash, Spotted Dick and Toad in the Hole… I can even teach them a little cockney rhyming slang and all the stuff about British culture – but I can’t teach them the Anishinaabe language, nor can I teach them traditional arts like hunting or dancing, or drumming. I can teach them beading as I’m the bomb at that… but nothing else.


On another note I wrote an earlier blog about being romantic. I was thinking hard about that after someone commented… and I realised that I don’t think I am a hopeless romantic. Course, a relationship with romance in it is a good thing… but I’m not the type that would spend three nights a week having candlelit dinners, dancing in a breezy gazebo in the moonlight, and renting out penthouse suites in hotels with rose petals sprinkled all over the floor.I meant that I want a relationship where I can feel the person loves me without having to say it to each other… without having to constantly walk arm in arm, or without having to constantly be touchy feely. I’ve been missing out on that since forever. Having never been in a relationship with love in it, I think it’s only natural to hypothesise about what it’s like… know what I mean? So I think I was wrong in the earlier post which SUCKS because I HATE contradicting myself.

My Blog

I’ve been thinking lately about where I want my blog to go. I’ve been looking at www.problogger.net and recently submitted my blog to www.critiquemyblog.com. I even did something which I vowed I would never do and that’s put advertisements on my website. I’m not really sure why I did it… maybe for another source of revenue as I don’t early nearly enough. But that’s not working out so not sure what to do.

I don’t get a WHOLE HUGE amount of traffic. I even briefly considered scrapping it altogether but then told myself I was fecking nuts and cleared that thought from my head immediately. Then I realised… by jove, I actually need my blog. It’s a source of stress relief for me – my style of blogging is quite literally what I am thinking as I think it. Although I can’t put 100% of what I’m thinking on here because of my domestic situation, there is about 98%. So don’t you worry all of you millions that love my blog :P it’s not going anywhere.

I’ve created some pages on some subjects I find interesting… such as the Nazi history of that old goat married to Elizabeth Regina II. Then the page about Michael Abney-Hastings who should be the legitimate monarch of Great Britain. Although… I’m increasingly resenting the entire Royal family.

Why should anyone pay homage or revere, or have someone deemed to have a higher social worth simply because they’re related to someone who was a bloodthirsty murdering tyrant in the past? I’m having an internal struggle – the Royal Family brings in close to one billion pounds of revenue from tourism every year.

I read a story on BBC News about a Pakistani woman who was boning this guy in England who was married to someone else and had a son. The woman resented the baby as a threat to her relationship and killed him by torture… slicing open his legs so his veins and tendons were showing. The baby had a broken thigh, shin and three broken ribs. This is one of those stories that literally had my pulse racing and made the rage in me fester even harder It’s those sort of philistines that deserve the death penalty by stoning. That stupid bitch would never have done that in Saudi Arabia or in China.. or Thailand. She comes to England to exploit our system of justice and murders a baby and doesn’t get convicted of murder. I don’t care what anyone thinks… I hope a vigilante grabs that woman by her hair one night, wraps it around her neck, ties her to the bedpost and throws her out the window so she hangs herself.

While I’m on the subject… I and millions of other British people are getting increasingly ashamed of just how much of a sycophantic establishment runs the country. Gordon Brown didn’t put George Bush in his place. When is any British Prime Minister ever going to get some balls and tell the President where he can stick his opinions and desires?